none of the previous.

You are here, a heart that doesn't fully beat for fear of rejection, scared of even the suggestion. You never know you can make amends, but sadly you cant even tell your friends. And the feeling of being alone grows. And you just want to let go. But then again if you tried to hold on what can you grip, such is life and the pain in your chest is not all that keeps you awake

the smell of stale cider and lost hope.

the smell of stale cider and lost hope, just when you wake up in the middle of a crisis and know in your heart no matter how long you carry on, you cant carry on. the stars used to look far away, now the clouds block their shine and all hope with only a box room of broken dreams were you keep all your little big things. who would of thought looking through a photo album would be so tiring, but at the same time your old self you cant help admiring. what would they say now if they could see the empty shell of what they were? would they even care? for back then saturday night was never so far away. were now days the resession has stole your weekend and sold it on ebay. while your single bed never hits the spot. and when you know one biscuit is never enough. and that is why they don't come in halfs. but sure the best memories are made of laughs.

Eye to Eye

(in)complete strangers, dancing away our pain, drunk off laughter and naive off heart, you to me are a reason for this beating heart. and unlovable as i may seem, i still dream and i still move and dance with you like in a dream, stop to kiss you like lovers on the screen. for tonight i've have drank enough to forget my sins and my ills. and i don't hear the screams of past lovers jealousy forget the world and be bold enough to hold you close to me, eye to eye there is no other, hold you close enough in hope to discover, a single heart beat...

back were i started at...

Losing battle winning war, the disappointment that keeps on giving. The little things and every sliver lining has a cloud. While everyday leaves you a little less, a weekend away with no sun. late nights, red lights and the need to need someone

no need.

trying to hold on, trying to be right. Though wrong keeps me up in the middle of the night, my head a buzz thinking of what was. and knowing it will never be again. i walk in a cloud, to much to soon every morning the alarm sounds of doom. what can i do but get up. the feelings dont let up, but i guess that is life and life is what you make it.

What difference does it make?

life is a funny old game. sometimes people often push there will apon you trying to make you do what they wish not knowing what goes on behind closed doors as you try and breath, while every breath hurts your chest. it isn't easy. it isn't getting better............

Stress

Stress comes and stress goes, trying to stand on my two feet all my life. To much to fear to marry a wife, just need time alone. but it is ok isn't it?? I mean we can just pretend this isn't the end. hanging on my the tips of your fingers waiting just waiting to be saved?! just wishing for more.. maybe it is time to just stand on my own two feet.