Mean something

Leg day is everyday

When you are always

Trying to out run

Your troubles and problems.

Your fears and doubts,

Try to drown them

To weak to figure them out.

To far from payday

The credit card maxed out.

And the only time someone cares

Is when they can get something

And you give til

You are left with nothing.

In hope that

What you give

Ment something

Sore tonight.

 The bottle tops hunt me

The next day. 

A reminder how easy it is 

To throw it all away. 

To lose all sense 

When chasing a high. 

Noone is coming to save me, 

Maybe I'm a bad person 

And that is why?

Friends gone with no goodbye. 

Over thinking everything, 

So I sniff to ease my mind. 

Lose myself in the powder, 

Sniffing the left overs, 

Trying to make sure 

to bin all the bottle tops.

My chest hurts, 

My head sore. 

Trying to work out 

Why I should carry on 

When I'm so sore. 

Die by the boos

Regret haunts my sleep.

Keeps me awake, 

Stressing over things 

I can't fix. 

I've said sorry, 

I've said goodbye. 

I've dried all the tears 

That fell from my eyes. 

And sometimes it feels 

That it isn't enough. 

Other times it's okay. 

But it gets me when I'm alone, 

And the hurt doesn't go away. 

The meds don't get close enough. 

And no one tells me it's okay

You've done enough. 

No one stops the walls 

At night closing in. 

The mind racing, 

With no answers, 

So like a fool, 

I lived for the cheers 

And will die by the boos.. 

To be wrong

I've been wrong.

I've been completely ugly.

But I'm yet to die,

And as such

I still grow and blossom.

Somedays ugly others

A beauty that would stop you

In your tracks 

You could do.

 Sniffed well past my welcome,

But to shy to say goodbye. 

Trapped in paranoia 

And I don't want to leave

Just keep trying to get high. 

The sun taunts me,

Reminds me, 

That reality isn't too far away. 

And you can try but you can't out sniff time. 

No trip to offy can stop tomorrow. 

And no gear on strap will help to. 

You want to run away. 

But you'll have to face it soon. 

We were sold rock n roll dreams, 

Via movies and TV. 

But it didn't turn out that way 

As you face another 9 to 5 week. 

Leaves your soul weak, 

And the twinkle in your eye 

No longer twinkles. 

The skip in your step long gone, 

As you think of the things

You wish you could do. 

One more?

 I licked the bag

So the fun is done.

But I don't feel numb,

I still can think.

Poured the last of the drink.

Not sure if it will do.

Stop me thinking,

And help me forget

What makes me blue.

It hurts,

And tomorrow it will hurt again to.

Lost,

And I don't know what to do?

The drugs don't work.

But lest they help me

Push through.

A amazing.

 Lost in a maze.

My own making.

Over thinking,

The drink and drugs

Don't numb the feeling

Long enough.

In my own head

I'm lost.

Wondering are we friends at all.

Would you catch me if I fall?

Clean my snotty nose.

I guess I'll never know.