It will get better

The hurts too great for the mind to take.

So excuse me while I numb myself.

Nothing really stops the hurt, 

The mind never stops, 

And the everything just gets worse. 

No holiday, no doctors letter. 

Just debt and friends telling you

It will get better. 

What else would you do?

Talking to myself,

Laying close to the wall. 

The shadows of the night 

Stroke my skin 

While a tears falls. 

Regrets often snowball. 

but I can never refuse, 

Another late night arguing with myself,

About things that I can't change, 

But what else is there to do?

Is now okay?

 Is now okay?

I'm up for a good time, 

But don't have the time or money. 

The joke isn't funny anymore. 

The nights are long when you can't sleep. 

Chest sore. 

Useless heart. 

Turn off the big light. 

The bed seems smaller than I remember, 

When someone else is there. 

And it doesn't matter

How much I toss and turn. 

The birds will soon be singing. 

Telling me I've fucked up. 

That morning is almost here, 

And it's time to get up,

For round 2.

The things you wish you could forget, 

But you'll still do. 

Heat the plate and buy a few beers. 

You don't cry, 

But you do shed a few tears. 

The saddest songs

Lined up in a row. 

Just to push the feeling, 

And let the feeling grow. 

Let the nose run, 

Forget dinner. 

No rest for the wicked, 

And nowhere to run. 

Pain in the chest.

 The party has to end.

And normal life resume. 

9 to 5 is calling, 

And Monday comes too soon. 

Your chest gives you scares, 

Your heart beats abit too hard. 

But by Wednesday 

You'll be ready to party hard. 

You never grow out of 

Drinking to excess. 

No hangover can beat the feeling 

Of dancing with your friends. 

No Monday blues 

Will ever make you quit. 

Because no matter how low you feel

You fuking love it. 

Quiting is for losers. 

The music never ends. 

And just forget the pain 

You feel in your chest

And take one of these. 

The party never starts round here

 I'm hurting and it feels no one cares.

Saying things but no one wants 

To read hear those words. 

No one wants to stop the party. 

Even if the party is just for one. 

It will be okay, 

Just get to bed before the sun. 

I'm holding my wound, 

Showing how deep it is. 

But it seems I'm alone. 

Running away from the hurt and pain.

When you honest 

Your invites to parties disappear. 

No one wants to stop dancing, 

Or face reality or truth. 

So the scars you have are too much, 

To see, 

So they don't want to look. 

A open book. 

This party isn't helping me. 

Just One more.

 The thing about one,

Is that their is always a strong need 

For one more. 

Even if you are broke 

Or working tomorrow. 

Even if your dearest loved one

Is in hospital and dying. 

Even if your so tired you can't think. 

Even when you are fuked due to the cold

And need rest and sleep. 

One more is a beast, 

That hunts the best of intentions. 

The just one and I'm going home, 

The I've got work tomorrow. 

And I've so much to do. 

But one more is a struggle, 

That often wins over you. 

Leads you astray. 

Ruins your plans 

And fuks your week ahead. 

A beast thst doesn't care. 

Keeps dial a drink busy

And dealers active, 

With texts of

Just one more. 

Something I said?

 He who loves the most, regrets the most.

As I imagine other lifetimes

when things worked out a little better,

and I wasn't so wet behind the ears.

And your tears weren't so salty,

And I said what it was 

That you needed to hear.

And it's okay if its not perfect.

Alright to sometimes 

To colour outside the lines

And it's hard not to fight it.

But life doesn't work 

If I'm scared all the time.

Which leaves me

sad that in this universe

I couldn't make it work,

And the love I had 

Turned to hurt. 

Like a rope tied to tight, 

A dim light. 

Overthinking was it something I said?