Diy

King of the bag,

Sore nose included. 

The sleepless nights, 

Everyday 

The on going flight or fight. 

The over thinking wears me out. 

Always wrong, 

even when I'm right. 

Change my own bed clothes 

And put my wash on. 

Clean my own dishes, 

Put away my own socks. 

You have to be independent

To be lonely, 

Scared to ask for help. 

Carry my own weight. 

Do it myself. 

I feel. 

Be more normal

 Dark and long,

When did it stop being fun?

Monday comes to quick,

And work makes me feel

Stressed and sick.

I can't work out

Who will i be today? 

All the masks to wear, 

But

I've only ever been me.

But never enough is never enough.

And I've been on this journey

Dark and long enough.

Smiles hide

When I don't know what to say.

It's OK,

It falls on deaf ears

And pushed away.

The stress eats away.

Who am I?

Or who will I pretend to be today?

The want to stay in bed.

Play dead.

Nothing changes,

Just the weather.

And wither or not I'll stay.

You lose hope

When the doctors have nothing

To stop the pain. 

To slow my mind. 

Lonely late nights,

And lost days.

Doesn't matter if the sun shines

I try and mask,

Be more normal.

Get a habit

And let it kill you. 

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 To be wrong

As my nose runs. 

The dog wants to go to bed. 

I want to drink til I forget. 

No one answers the messages I sent. 

No one knows the mess I'm in. 

I can't stop, 

Cause I just want to stop thinking. 

Repost maybe?

 Brexit at Tiffanys,

It's not me, it's you.

It's not us.

It isn't that it couldn't of been.

It's just something I can't explain.

Rubbish, dancing with the wind.

Trying to shower away a life of sin.

A fight, you'll never win.

R u OK?

Blood sports,

Scars on a broken heart. 

A friend in the dark.

Was one of those

Are you sure it was a dream?

Dreams.

The fine line,

Like a button you shouldn't touch.

Has to be crossed.

Is it my fault?

Or can I blame someone else? 

Everyone has a part to play. 

And the road never ends. 

One dance left,

I tell my knees! 

Sure tomorrow's another day.

The monster that is me

 Demons in my dreams

won't leave me be.

Forever on the run,

All nite I can't sleep.

Ghosts hunt my mind.

And the quiet of night

Means

Their voices are so loud.

And so I turn,

But the bed still

Isn't comfortable.

The images and voices

All come at once,

While my nose runs.

I had my fun.

I see the room get lighter

With the rising sun.

Birds singing

Just to rub it in.

A hour left and I fall asleep.

The demons still chase me.

But I stop feeling scared.

And stop to face

This demon,

The thing,

Only to see it was me.

I can't. Maybe.

 Take this runny nose

And point it home. 

I'm out of time. 

Clouds pass through me. 

Feels like Noone got to know me. 

Like a secret. 

The many layers 

Like an onion. 

More then one side 

Like a coin. 

I wish it didn't stop

Being fun.

The good times feel

A lifetime away.

The parties over,

And the final cans

Binned,

And ashtrays emptyed,

With the windows open,

To disperse the smell

Of smoke and good times.