A Self medicated life

Life is a strange wonder. I have started 2015 with a positive mind set, and it has started greatly. Though the fear and negative side kicks in and spread like cancer. I acted in like my old self from a long time ago before i lost hope, back when i self medicated with drink, drugs but most of all the thought that love could save me. Sadly one step a head, or even ten steps! head first, into the darkness, the unknown. But weirdly it is the first time in such a long time i have felt in this manner, and as wrong as it is................ IT felt alright. But now to prepare for the funk fall out, be one step a head of the crowd and beat the down by knowing what is coming as it always has come!