Saturday, 24 January 2026

Mistake

 The highs the lows,
My runny nose, 
And the need to need someone 
Who needs me. 
The empty cider cans
By my bed on the night stand. 
2am, I'm a clown
And I won't sleep well
If at all, 
Tonight just another mistake
That I shouldn't of made, 
But then how I can I resist 
The clown in me. 
No dinner, 
Just lines, 
The runny nose of a clown. 
Tomorrow I'll feel down, 
But then I won't learn from this mistake. 

Sense

 I'm sorry.
I am pure chaos.
I part know how I became this. 
But not what came with it. 
The dislike and hate. 
The anger. 
I don't know why it follows me. 
I can't understand it. 
It makes no sense. 

Out too late

 Bags and beers,
We're self medicating over here. 
Over did the late nights, 
Waiting for the off lience to open. 
Fake smiles, 
Stereo nazi, 
Play my mix. 
Infact na forget it. 
We don't care for Monday, 
We hate the 9 to 5.
We take anything just to feel alive. 
But the late night burn us out. 
And there is only so much we can take. 
I should of got a taxi a long time ago. 
But I can't help the urge to stay
Out too late. 

Sunday, 11 January 2026

Play my choon next.

 The meds are near out,
Fegs down to who is an actual smoker
And can prove it,
Beers maybe enough to dial a drink come out.
Dead bodies,
And a table littered to the point
Of you should get a taxi and get out.
But you never let the finer details get in the way.
You are here to prove a point
And won't let anyone get in the way.

It's nit me it's you

 Rack another line
We still have time.
As time itself doesn't exist.
It's just made up.
A trap.
Like the paper and coins,
The one way street.
The poor siding with the billionaire,
In hope their lottery ticket that them there.
But it won't.
And Monday will still be the same.
Hating each other,
Cause the rich man says.

But what about the immigrants?
The Indian grooming gangs?
Well what about is it 80%
Of pedos is the white man?
But what about housing for the veterans?
There aren't many veterans left.
But still sure what about our own?
It's funny how our own mean anything,
After all these years.
Cut backs and attack.
Have you watched the news?
Most politicians come from a financially stable background.
Not caring the price of milk.
Whole 80% of homeless are from care homes.
No one to help when it gets too much.
I over spent at Christmas but can get a lend off my mum.
One missed payment,
4 days off, 
statuary sick pay doesn't cover what's owed.
Heat or eat when it's cold?
Counting pennies,
Embarrassed,
But you need to cover what you owe.
Your local pm doesn't speak your language.
Doesn't know how bad the damp is hard to manage.
Doesn't know how you survive by working two jobs,
Doesnt know how
Enough so tired,
You can't sleep.
Your brain wide awake.
And we all wish for a happy ending.
But maybe we need to stop pretending.
We are all one line away from no hope.

Thursday, 8 January 2026

Crappo the clown.

 Cider and sleeping pills.
Just incase I can sleep tonight. 
It's been a fight. 
No tunnel with a light. 
No end to the sad, bad and shit times.
Lost souls, 
Take my hand, 
I can save you from the current. 
But I'm not strong enough. 
Our fingers can't hold on, 
As i lose everything I love. 
My memories. 
My close that died with out a goodbye.
As I chased my high.
Messages wrote with one eye. 
Words are no use. 
No excuse. 
I'm just trying. 
But is there any use? 

The only thing that will make me feel like I would be good to be able to sleep as well

 Numbing the pain
Drugs, alcohol and mostly cocaine. 
Dealers know me by name. 
Big dog you're the best customer 
Your craic is mighty. 
But truth is inside I'm dying. 
The cocaine use to be for hiding. 
But the mask falls, 
One line and a tear falls. 
Staring at empty rooms and pictureless walls
Hunting my own house. 
Hunted by old ghosts. 
The toss and turn as the drink wears off. 
The bed is not comfortable. 
Blood stains and tear drops on the pillow. 
The doctor can't prescribe an antidote. 
I'm lost, but not quite given up. 
But how long can cocaine keep you up?