Friday, 23 May 2014
the sleeping tablets kick in and i can hear the birds sing. i didnt witness nor know it was the end, but i had a sneaking feeling. i recall when i touched her thigh, and in that moment thought that things could be alright. for i had what i always wanted and wished for, i had found love. the kind you see in soap opreas, but not in movies. it was intense, a feeling i will never forget, though with time the pictures in my mind dull and fade, i will never forget.
The sons of mothers in search of others, eyes lit by the dark, with fading passon that once could win a lonely heart, only rejection breaks more then tenfold. And the scene is played out in mute and ever so slow. Questions left unanswerable fester and swoll, taking up more room till the spirit is no longer whole
Wednesday, 7 May 2014
you tell me the worse truthful lies trying to cut me when I already bleed, unknown to you how I need. you try to feed on my guilt, but anger grows instead. And the darkness covers and grows, lost souls circle the bed. but no rest, no way. and everyday pales more, and the sky is forever gray. while tomorrow is just another day. I tell you in code that I have to go, but you will never know, I already cut myself so.
You are here, a heart that doesn't fully beat for fear of rejection, scared of even the suggestion. You never know you can make amends, but sadly you cant even tell your friends. And the feeling of being alone grows. And you just want to let go. But then again if you tried to hold on what can you grip, such is life and the pain in your chest is not all that keeps you awake
Tuesday, 8 April 2014
the smell of stale cider and lost hope, just when you wake up in the middle of a crisis and know in your heart no matter how long you carry on, you cant carry on. the stars used to look far away, now the clouds block their shine and all hope with only a box room of broken dreams were you keep all your little big things. who would of thought looking through a photo album would be so tiring, but at the same time your old self you cant help admiring. what would they say now if they could see the empty shell of what they were? would they even care? for back then saturday night was never so far away. were now days the resession has stole your weekend and sold it on ebay. while your single bed never hits the spot. and when you know one biscuit is never enough. and that is why they don't come in halfs. but sure the best memories are made of laughs.
(in)complete strangers, dancing away our pain, drunk off laughter and naive off heart, you to me are a reason for this beating heart. and unlovable as i may seem, i still dream and i still move and dance with you like in a dream, stop to kiss you like lovers on the screen. for tonight i've have drank enough to forget my sins and my ills. and i don't hear the screams of past lovers jealousy forget the world and be bold enough to hold you close to me, eye to eye there is no other, hold you close enough in hope to discover, a single heart beat...
Wednesday, 5 March 2014
Losing battle winning war, the disappointment that keeps on giving. The little things and every sliver lining has a cloud. While everyday leaves you a little less, a weekend away with no sun. late nights, red lights and the need to need someone
Saturday, 1 February 2014
trying to hold on, trying to be right. Though wrong keeps me up in the middle of the night, my head a buzz thinking of what was. and knowing it will never be again. i walk in a cloud, to much to soon every morning the alarm sounds of doom. what can i do but get up. the feelings dont let up, but i guess that is life and life is what you make it.
Thursday, 23 January 2014
life is a funny old game. sometimes people often push there will apon you trying to make you do what they wish not knowing what goes on behind closed doors as you try and breath, while every breath hurts your chest. it isn't easy. it isn't getting better............