Wednesday, 24 August 2011

sleep sleep sleep sleep no sleep tonight

the morring comes to quick while im chasen sleep,
bed time was hours ago but im to scared of the morring to quit.
my mind in over time my body too,
so sleep as much as i try there is no way i can find you.
curse the bed for it wont take me to my dreams.
the night blanket of dark wont stay long enought it seems,
and i dont want it yet to go and for it to be morring.
no sleep tonight to much to do,
on my mind are lovers clues.
there's a window chance i take,
the burden of a minds weight arm's it breaks.

how do you. do..l./.p;ppl..,.

gone are the hands that set me free
everyday feels like monday,
every moment im awake i feel as tho a little bit more of my heart may break
to far to care to near not to know.
i need more then i can show
to old to bold to cold to much,
i just dont know were to start and were it stops.
its the same over and over i go,
why wont life set me free,
stuck in what seems to be the worse of a bad dream.

Sunday, 21 August 2011

Its 3 o'clock in the morring and it isnt startin to get light.

I am sadly i think becomin manic again. Thankfully i havent suffered to many lows, just one. Tho the highs have been plenty, infact on second count the lows may be more but I cant recall how many, when or were..

I am dreamin of girls, they play on my mind non stop. I cant stop thinkin of them and the thrill of the chase... I dont know if it is right or who is wrong? What are these feelings?!

At 30 I thought things would be easy to work out but my mindi s a whrill of thoughts....

Saturday, 20 August 2011

a lonely battle that could never be won tonight.

some times i lose sight, some times i wonder why i put up a fight, but tonight, tonight is just like any other night. and so the warm burns me, it as ever will never learn me. and im still tryin, tho in the back of my mind i know at the same time im dyin. a slow death, a slow stop, killin me softly and i wish you would stop. but not tonight, tonight is just like every night. so im holdin me head on the cold side of the pillow cause im so warm, and i want to keep myself safe from harm, but harms always not more then ten feet away and if i could i would do everything my own way but not tonight because tonight is just like any other night, and with that i need her so, so can someone tell me were to go, if i could maybe find the one who got away then maybe i wouldnt need to numb the pain, alone out in the dark soaked by the rain i feel as tho my best times have gone and im fighten just to be myself once again.

Wednesday, 17 August 2011

thats it good night, even tho i cant sleep tonight..

Is the pain worth our time?
im waitin as always
but I know for all the waitin your never going to be mine!
So were is there to go were we cant be alone?!
im holdin back, but what is the use you already know the criac.
tonight tonight, i need you so, but as much as i need you wont let me have you.
im lookin, and im glancen,
i as always am chancen, my arm.
and you dont know what your worth.
but tonight as today as tomorrow i wish i could,
show you and hold you.
we could be happy and i could make you see
but chances arnt that easy,
and would you even recognize me?
could you even save me?
i cant live on maybes cause baby i need you to much to say,
but like always i wont get my way and the only way out isnt what i want,
i just want you to save me tonight.
but i cant even save myself and my wispers are lost on the wind.
So who am i to say were this might end???????????????????????????????????????????

i think its the last one tho i cant be sure were else to go?

Iam waitin for you to reply.
Just do it for im holdin on till the sun has gone and mid night has come.
Your just another in a long long line,
and to be true heart break is for me nothing new.
For even if its yours its still mine too
As i know the feelin to well.
So i wish i could make you happy, i wish i knew what to do,
But nothing is right and the world is sadly to cruel
For someone like me to be with you.
Searching for peace of mind to get it right,
But the tide has took what the moon cant say
And as ever its just me, fighten demons that would make the strongest of hearts flee.
So who am i to object if you have to go then please dont look back.

Wednesday, 10 August 2011

The Hunt.

The feeling of dread as i go to bed,
It feels nothing i did is like anything i said.
untie these ropes i cant feel my heart beat.
and the rain falls, and catches me unawares,
unprepaired, unknown in this dark night.
and still these ropes are soo so tight.
and i cant feel my heart beat anymore.
so the longing for something for someone,
but nothing will do.
and the rain falls cold as the night grows darker.
while i hunt for you,

Monday, 1 August 2011

who am i to say.

Loose change like loose lips are all thats left from another bad night.
Another tare, another tear, another day, another year.
And i would give anything but it seems anything wouldnt come close to do,
So another night of asking old ghosts what can i do?
So you wont hunt me the way you do.
So im waitin for a change, waitin for a chance, waitin for the last dance.
And after the sunshine comes rain,
cause every sliver linein has a cloud,
And really at this time off my life i shouldnt be so bold,
But tonight i wont do what as im told and for that i'am not proud.
So who am i to say,
but who are you to leave me a little bit less then i could be.
And tonight all i am left with is this small change and used tissues,
and these issues.